Monday, November 10, 2008


يا طائراً في خاطري
يهفو, يحرك للجمال مشاعري

قد كنتِ محرابيَ الذي
أقمتُ فيه شعائري
بستاناً أخضراً
زرعتُ فيه بشائري

أشعر أن العمرَ من دونكِ عقربٌ
في ساحةِ الأقدارِ ليس بدائرِ

أنا قد رحلت
وأسدلت قبل الرحيل ستائري

Someone wrote this for me back in 1999, I changed it a bit and decided to publish it on my blog..

Monday, November 3, 2008

5 Reasons Why Your Woman Is Angry

Well don’t you guys want to know what’s going on when your woman is angry for no obvious reason, when she all of a sudden snaps at you, when the drama is in the air and you just don’t know what is it that you have done to deserve such treatment. Well here are 5 reasons why a woman might snap at you when you think you did not deserve it.
1. PMS:
On a journey through the uncharted seas of perimenopause and menopause many women encounter rough sailing. Days maybe filled with the swells and troughs of depression, tears, mood swings, irrational angry outbursts, lethargy, and fatigue.
Their moods and body may seem totally out of control. What is happening ?The emotional roller coaster that accompanies premenstrual syndrome (PMS), perimenopause and post menopause is most profoundly connected to the flow of two powerful hormones, estrogen and progesterone. The change in hormones levels during the premenstrual cycle does in fact affect their moods and cause some out of control behaviors, knowing your woman, knowing how she normally reacts, understanding what she is going through will definitely help tune down the drama and handle the situation in a less emotional way.
How to know its PMS?
Well if you are intimate you will notice that the mood swings could go from wanting to have intimacy and being seriously dramatic about things that she normally wouldn’t be dramatic about, also if she is not usually a crier you will notice that she will be shedding lots of tears for any reason.
It’s of course different from one woman to the other, you can of course know by asking her, a woman knows what mood swings she gets and when through her premenstrual cycle. 2. Piling up:
Some women are too sensitive but they barely show it, I think it’s about low self esteem, they just keep pressuring their selves and holding inside until out of nowhere she snaps at you over something- at that moment- doesn’t seem like a big deal.
If you are with a woman who tends not to really show how she feels, and keep pressuring herself try to ask her questions to know if she is okay, in the matter of fact asking too many questions is a good way of communicating with your partner, sometimes just asking a general question like what’s wrong or how are you feeling doesn’t really give you much of a detailed answer, you need to dig in and ask some serious questions detailed questions, and it really helps once in a while to ask your woman if she is happy and what scares her off or what’s really her biggest concern at the moment.
How do you know your woman is piling up?
Well you listen to her when she snaps and try to keep it quiet until everything comes out and she opens up to you with everything, also don’t ever say things like oh so after all you are stubborn? Or oh so you are not as quiet as you used to say you are? Just don’t say stuff like that or anything that will encourage the piling behavior. Accusations and judgments from your partner do affect how open you are about your feelings and emotions, like if she asks a question that you think is just too silly or that you don’t really want to answer just don’t shut her down, encourage opening up by opening up to her yourself telling her your plan, having that relationship conversation you have been avoiding for a while. Make sure you handle problems one by one as soon as they occur and be sure that your partner is absolutely letting go of that matter and that a final solution has been reached, and that she brought out everything she kept inside to the light so that nothing will stay there and pile up through time.
3. Diet:
Everybody knows you are what you eat, but for some reason, most of us don't connect that old adage with how we feel. Your body and your mind are both parts of you, so of course what you eat doesn't just affect your health, it also affects your mental state.
One big set of chemicals that control mood are the neurotransmitters in the brain led by the pleasure "drug" serotonin. These substances determine whether you feel good and energetic or tired, irritable, and spacey.
If your woman is on a diet she could be probably suffering from deficiency in certain vitamins or minerals, or perhaps she is depriving herself of some food that is causing her mood to be low. 4. Emotional Frustration:
Sometimes women have expectations that may not be exactly what you guys are looking for at the moment, see we all dream about wedding gowns, cakes, bridesmaids, babies, pink fluffy stuff, shoes, bags, rings, yes we do and you can’t change that, now sometimes when you say that someday you want to have kids what we hear is: “Expect a proposal very soon cause I want to have kids with you” or when a woman asks you “Honey I saw a beautiful wedding gown at the mall” and you go “oh why didn’t you try it on see how it looks like on you” in our head we hear: “Try it on honey and I hope it fits you now because I will marry you now and you will wear that dress in our wedding” unless you are proposing this weekend, that’s a big NO NO! unless you are ready to make a serious commitment, avoid conversations including babies, wedding gowns, or wedding rings, in fact don’t ever mention the word wedding if you are not already engaged to that woman, see when you guys meet a woman the first thing you do is picturing her naked, the first thing we do is picturing you in a tuxedo wowing at her beautiful white gown while her father holds her hand walking towards you.
That’s one reason that may cause emotional frustration and cause your woman to be depressed and disappointed, if you have been giving her false messages, or if you know she is depending on you to do something please don’t let her down.
The problem is that after emotional frustrations a woman can’t exactly say what’s upsetting her because in her point of view it’s something that she expects you to know or do by yourself.
How do you keep your woman from being frustrated?
By telling her exactly how you feel and what your plans are, what you are expecting from the relationship and where you are going. By not getting her too emotional and make her think she will be expecting a proposal from you soon while you are planning on taking your time. Don’t ask her hypothetically if she would marry you unless you are planning to propose very very soon, and by soon I mean days not months. 5. Miscommunication:
I know we are not easily understood, we tend to comprehend things according to our perspectives, we are edgy and emotional but we communicate in general more than you guys do. I know that almost every man on earth thinks he knows what women want and I can swear that this is not true.
No it’s not how you look that interests me it’s how you make yourself look, it’s not where you work it’s what you do for a living, it’s not how much you have it’s how much you are willing to spend on me, and it’s not just how you feel about me it’s also how you make me feel about myself.
There are so many things that you need to understand about your woman and communicating is the best way to do, ask questions be curious and when you do please listen to the answers, don’t interrupt even if you were going to say I love you, if you want someone to really love you, you need to make them feel good about themselves, conditional love is a no no, don’t ever tell your partner that if she does this or that you will love her more, or that you might lose her if she continues doing somthing, unless it’s extremely true and necessary don’t ever say that it will just make your partner feel insecure.Don’t be that guy who knows how a woman feels about something and goes right away telling her that this really doesn’t matter, even if how she feels is hating how she looked in the party last night, or not wanting some other even to steal her thunder on her special day because it is a big deal to her, and if you don’t feel the same way try to be understanding and supportive and don’t say things like that’s just stupid or I don’t really care.